April 24, 2013

• The Family Business

  Today was shit.

  tl;dr

  If I haven’t made this clear, I work for my dad. I’ve worked for him (on and off) since I was 16. In high school it was just a few days after school and the occasional Saturday, but the older I got the more often I worked when I was home. Last summer (2012) I worked full time. I became so invaluable that they actually hired someone to replace me when I left. She only works part time, but she’s been working there for 8 months. And she’s really nice, but she’s also a little out of it, takes a lot of sick days, and still (after 8 months) needs help with a lot of stuff. We’ll call her Q. Now, two weeks ago, one of my other coworkers, Z, filed her two weeks. Which was a huge bummer because she’s been working for my dad for the last 13 years so I’ve known her over half my life. Z is awesome and did a lot of important stuff for the office, including the electronic filing. She was solely responsible for the electronic filing except for a few times last summer when I did it because she was on vacation. Because of her duty as e-filer, she had her own computer that was attached to a scanner. I’m also going to point out that my other two coworkers (one full time and one part time, both working for my dad for 3+ years now) both have their own computers as well. Over the summer I set up a laptop in the corner of the desk area and that was “my” computer. Q started using that computer after I left. For the last few weeks, I have been working part time on the days Q isn’t in, so we’ve both been using the laptop. Since Z put in her two weeks, there has been talk in the office about who would get her computer and who would do the e-filing. Originally my dad said Q and I would split the e-filing, but everyone (other than my dad) agrees that Q is not competent enough to handle that. Don’t get me wrong, she’s super sweet, but she just really isn’t trustworthy with stuff like that. If you give her a direct task she does it, but she cannot multitask and she may ask 1000 questions. And she doesn’t think to do tasks unless you ask her to. So someone would have to be constantly reminding her to do the computer work and she wouldn’t be able to do anything else once she started doing it, which is problematic since we do get waves of business where you have to drop whatever you were doing to help people. Z talked to my dad about this before she left. And, like I said, the rest of us that actually work out in the front (my dad and my uncle, who I haven’t even started on yet, do not) understand what goes into working out in the front and recognize that Q just isn’t up to par. On the contrary, I am an EXCELLENT worker. I am damn good at my job and I’m proud of that. So you would think that after 6 years of working on and off, and now that I’m working full time for at least a year, I would get Z’s computer and Q would get the laptop for herself and all would be well. But nope. My dad decides that Q and I are going to split the computer work and share the two computers. Which to me is infuriating for a few reasons:

  • I have seniority.
  • I am full time. She is part time.
  • I do not want to be put at the same level as her. See bullets one and two.
  • I have spent the last 6 years working really hard to prove that I deserve my job. I face accusations of nepotism on a regular basis from my dad’s business partner and half the patients treat me like I’m incompetent because I still look like I’m 17 (I’m 22 and have a college degree). I’ve heard some really nasty things said about me when patients think I can’t hear them. I would like some proof that there is some confidence in me. Because putting me on the same level of Q isn’t saying “I trust her.” It’s saying “we’ll see who does the job better and then gradually push it over to them.” 
  • I am a better worker. If you’re giving a promotion, you give it to the better worker. If there is more work to do, you give it to the better worker. I’m the better worker. EVERYONE KNOWS THIS. Including my dad and uncle. 
  • Eventually this is going to be my practice. I should be taking more responsibility and proving that I can do more work in the practice. I never brought this point up because what’s the point. 

  So yeah. Especially the fourth point. So today I walk into work and Z’s computer says “Q & J,” J being me. And I flipped out. My other coworker who was in today agreed with me that it wasn’t ok. So I confronted my dad about it with my uncle sitting next to me. Turns out my uncle set it that way. Then both of them ganged up on me and berated me for thinking that it mattered. Like, I was getting yelled at because it upset me that I wasn’t getting the computer. Even though EVERYONE ELSE IN THE OFFICE UNDERSTANDS WHY IT MATTERS, the two of them can’t. I was so mad I almost cried. I was pissed the rest of the day. Then we get home and I confront my dad about it and it starts again. And then my mom chimes in on his side, saying that from Q’s perspective she has been working 8 months and now the doctor’s daughter shows up and gets the computer. But just because it looks like nepotism to a newcomer doesn’t mean it is. And I shouldn’t be punished because she’s new. And I began crying. Like really and truly crying. And my dad just kept being like “I don’t see why it matters.” Now up until this point I focused on points 1, 2, and 5… and I got yelled at for saying Q isn’t as good of a worker as me (even though my dad has fucking said it himself before). So finally I dove into points 3 and 4. Three, not surprisingly, still didn’t go over well. But once I tied it into four… well, that’s when I really started crying. I just want one fucking vote of confidence from my dad. And he can say to me “you’re great, I’m so glad you’re working for me, thank you for working for me” all he wants, but if he keeps treating me like a second-rate employee in the office then its all talk. And with so many people questioning my competency, giving me the computer and trusting me with the work would mean a lot to me. And I understand that anytime he gives me anything it could look like he is favoring his daughter, but in this case I really earned it and I don’t think it’s fair that I’m being told “no” just so that we don’t hurt Q’s feelings. So finally he caved and agreed that the computer was mine, the e-filing is mine, and Q officially has the laptop as her computer, but I don’t think he agreed because he realized I was right. I think he agreed because his daughter was sitting across the table crying her eyes out. So I don’t feel good about it at all. And my fucking uncle, who I still haven’t gotten into and I don’t think I will, fucked up everything by changing the computer yesterday when Q was there, so now she’s going to see that the computer had her name on it and now it doesn’t. And she’s going to be upset. And it’s going to SUCK. And it’s going to cause tension in the office that is usually only reserved for my dad’s business partner. And she is probably going to resent me. And I feel awful that I got what I wanted by literally crying to my dad about it, but in this case I don’t think that I’m wrong. I just wish that he actually saw it that way.

  On the plus side, I was so angry that I went for my run and actually did the best mile I’ve done so far. And then I promptly smoked half a bowl. Of course, my brilliant plan could have resulted in me getting caught because my parents did not do what they said they were going to do while I was out on my run, but no one has said anything to me about my shifty behavior so I’m hoping that I’m in the clear. Though I have learned my lesson. So the thing that was supposed to de-stress me just caused me to freak out as soon as I walked inside and saw that everyone was not where I wanted them to be. 

  Then I went and tried to play Portal since my Israeli friend bought me the pack on Steam (just because I said I had always wanted to play it. He bought me it. I’m not even getting into that now) and I don’t know if it was from running and smoking, smoking and playing, running and playing, or the combination of all three, but I got seriously nauseous and had to stop.

  I also didn’t get to play ukulele today which was a bummer. 

  Now for intakes, which actually don’t suck despite high snackage:

  Intake for Monday, April 22:
  B: banana (100)
  L: subway breakfast sandwich (320)
  S: protein bar (110)
  D: tofu stirfry (270)
  High snacks (500)
  TOTAL = 1300

  Intake for Tuesday, April 23:
  B: chobani (140)
  L: salad with tuna (140), 2 hershey’s kisses with caramel (42)
  D: tofu stirfry (200), cookie (130)
  High snacks (320)
  TOTAL = 972
  Out: 1 mile run (120)
  Net: 852

  • 1:44 am
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